Two days to eat
it took me
A week to sit still enough to watch TV
it took me
Fifteen days to close my eyes and not see it
it took me
Three weeks to read a sentance
it took me
Four to read a page
it took me
A month to not cry every day
it took me
Five to think that spring might come
it took me
A year to sleep and not dream of it
it took me
Fourteen months to breath fully
it took me
Two years to write
it took me
Three to write in the first person
it took me
8,000 miles to find a place in me for you
it took me
Four years and seven months to speak

it took me   it took me   it took me
and threw me away

and in the days and hours that have passed since
I'm putting me back together
in a different order than before:
now I do not fear guns, I fear trust.